I am Numb

I conceive Im numb to life.Recently, wizard of my close friends died after(prenominal) a dogged battle with cancer. At his funeral I was encircled by the large number I am nearest to, volume that I cut down eery twenty-four hour period with, in the most(prenominal) distraught states Ive ever seen. As pictures of my friends life roll by on the screen higher up us, those around me stone-broke down in tear; they openly cried for the loss of his youthfulness life. Even the toughest of guys cried without shame. I looked around and witnessed this mourning, I saw the gut-wrenching tears of my friends mother in the front row, merely could not cry. I felt distress and guilt for not celebrating his life which I knew would end, hardly not a undivided tear came to my eye.Im not certainly whether the news, the movies Ive seen or my own ism on expiration keeps me from delivering my sadness by tears, exclusively I do make out that even when I belief the time is right for me to cry, I am unable. I swear that I extremity sensation in my life, but I receive that I whitethorn have debar myself off feelingally. As a man, I feel as if I need to be a strong and reserved kind of soulfulness. away emotion makes me feel weak and although I know this is a misconception, some amour inside me refuses t let my emotions show. I feel skittish that this inability to express my emotions could lead to greater complications, such(prenominal) as an inability to love. Ive seen the way peck displace when they take aim theyre in love and I dont know if I can act towards another person in this manner. It is feasible that I havent see feelings strong adequacy to prompt such emotional actions, but something inside me is fainthearted if I could ever feel this strongly about soul else. The funny thing is, is that I am more late touched by sappy sports exult movies and sad or epic songs than I am by actual occurrences in the reality of my life. I think thi s is maybe be feature Im able to interest to an experience that mortal else is having and apply my emotions to how I imagine that scrap would feel, but when I find myself in a sincerely emotion bit of my life, I debar down. Now that I am sensible of this problem in my life, I fancy to change my ways. No matter what the cause of my lack of emotion;I believe Im numb to life.If you urgency to get a full essay, severalize it on our website:

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